How I've Figured Out To Be An Introverted Christian

I am an introvert. On the Meyers Briggs I am an INFP.   My mother tells stories from when I was 3 or 4 of company coming to our house and I would turn up missing only to be found behind a chair hiding. From elementary school through college I would get so apprehensive about speaking in front of a group of people that I would get light headed and almost pass out. About 18 years ago I had a performance review as a youth minister which required me to say Hi to people in the church hallways on Sunday mornings. I am without a doubt an introvert.

As an introvert I relate very well to other introverts, I completely understand the pressure of living as an introvert in an extroverted world. I recently had an introverted friend recommend a book to me about introverts. It was an awesome book that explored how our culture has spent the last 100 years setting up the extrovert as the ideal person and the introvert as almost having a handicap. The book challenges the perception that introversion is a handicap by pointing out all that introverts have added to our culture. I loved the book!

However just as our culture has embraced an extrovert as the ideal person so too have our Christian churches embraced the idea that the ideal Christian is an extrovert. Perhaps a John the Baptist or Paul type who are gregarious and bold and into everything. In my first few years of youth ministry I worked around alot of other youth ministers who were the classic high energy pied piper style of extroverted youth minister while I was the quieter relational type of youth minister. I always felt as if I were a failure because of my quieter style. I would attempt to imitate the extroverted youth ministers but it would end with me becoming frustrated and angry.

However as time moved along I began to observe some startling things. A surprising number of the extroverted youth ministers crashed and burned emotionally, spiritually, and morally. For some their high energy was something that they were not able to maintain in the long run. For others their ego was stoked by the admiration of those they worked with which led a number of them to crash and burn. There were still others whose relationship with God was dependent upon things such as those around them and the energy of the Sunday morning worship. This group began to crash and burn spiritually as they were let down by those around them and/or the Sunday worship at their church was too dull and lifeless. While these extroverted youth ministers were deeply impacted by the people and events around them I was able to stick in there and continue to minister because my strength and spirituality did not derive from external stimuli.

As I continued year after year in ministry I began to crave time alone with God which became a primary foundation for my spiritual life. For me, an introverted minister, I gain emotional and spiritual renewal from time alone when it is just God and I.  Consequently the ups and downs of the churches and the members I have served with have not sent my own spiritual life on a roller coaster which is likely why I am still in ministry 23 years later after so many others I have served with are no longer in ministry.

For years some extroverted people have seen my introversion as a handicap but the older I get the more I realize that this world and the church could not exist without introverts. Look at this web site showing personality types for various people from history. Life would not be the same without the talents brought to bear by the introverts of the world.

Here are some ways I allow my introversion to play itself out as a Christian:

• I spend alot of time in prayer. I pray for myself, the church, and people. I always find time to pray no matter when or where I am. I pray when I'm at work, when I drive, when I'm in bed at night, and when I ride my bicycle. Occasionally I will find time to spend the day or multiple days committed to prayer. What is wild is that some amazing interactions with God have occurred when I commit to an extended time in prayer with God. 
• I seek out ways to interact with people one on one or in small groups. One of my current ministries is working with Sugar Grove's new members where I discovered it worked much better when I sat down to talk with our new members one family at a time. This allows me to get to know each family and specifically address the new member orientation process to personally fit each person. It might seem more efficient to conduct new member orientations in a large group but I have discovered incredible benefit in giving focused attention to each family. 

For those of you who are introverts... Jump in and let God use you! Allow God to leverage your strengths to bring glory to His name. Just because your renewal and strength does not come from other people does not mean you don't need people in your life. Instead recognize that God brings people into your life for specific reasons and in turn he will lead you into other people's lives for very specific reasons. Don't try to be an extrovert. Be the person God made you to be realizing our society has been down on introverts for a good while now- in fact alot of people think Jesus was an introvert! Now that's awesome!!